This is my last blog before I go to the beach tomorrow. What? You say, But you are using a desktop! However will you blog!? Do not fret, my dear reader, MY LAPTOP IS COMING HOME TODAY! AFTER THREEE IMPOSSIBLE WEEKS I WILL HAVE IT BACK WITHIN MY GRASP! Does dance.

So I haven't uhh... packed yet. I need to go do that. now. But I promise you I will return tomorrow with a great post! It will be awesome. But I REALLY need to go pack

So I will leave you with a video:













and seee you tomorrow!!

My Book Review Sort-of

I just spent the day reading about 500 pages of The Sweet Far Thing by Libba Bray. I had promised myself I would do many things today but they were all shunned for this. It was a fantastic book, as an aspiring-writer I must give kudos to Libba Bray. Her writing was so pretty and the way she described things... I could say she might be Hans Christian Anderson reincarnated as a girl but she writes better than that. The story's plot was kind of about magic [please read about series for further explanation] but she described things so gorgeously that everything in the book became magical. That woman knows how to use her metaphors. I became so entranced in the book, that when I finished it and got up from the couch I was so far from reality I couldn't fathom that my name wasn't Gemma Doyle and I didn't live in Victorian England.

So to-day's blog has to be about The Sweet Far Thing or else it would be untrue to my day. Let me repeat: I spent just about the whole day reading that book. I mean, if you want I could rant about how computer Solitaire is fixed and was conceived by terrorists to be completely un-winnable and evil I can, but somehow I think you would no longer read my blog after that. So I will talk about The Sweet Far Thing. Kinda.

Okay, so I got distracted for a few moments playing this. Play it. Now.

If you didn't read it, sorry. Major spoiler. It ended with much saddness (Agh! I couldn't spoil it for you! I am weak)... romantically. Sad ending. You should read it. The whole series is only about 1600 pages, thats all it takes to get there (this is why I also spent all [most] of Tuesday reading the second book, Rebel Angels). This got me thinking, did I prefer the tragic ending? Is that perhaps more romantic than a happy ending? Or am I just a rotten girl and enjoy others suffering? I think I look back at my own sad, little, barely-existent love life and say yup, I can relate. I can most definately relate. I mean, everybody can relate to having their heart torn out and given to a hungry god as a sacrifice. It is one of those things life has bountiful. An alarming number of people can't relate to the happy endings. I look at married couples and it makes me sad because they are so not in love.

It makes people wonder if happy endings even exist. Hans Christian Anderson didn't believe in happy endings, I have never seen a happy ending, who is to say they do exist? Maybe heartbreak is in some twisted disturbing way happier than an actual happy ending. Heartache is quite a breathtaking feeling. You can be horribly, horribly sad but like a burnt forest, the creation afterwards is stronger and more beautiful than ever before. And when you find some ash while the forest is regrowing, you can't help but smile. You look back on ever second before the heartbreak preciously and it inspires a burning hope. When you have a happy ending, how can you have hope? The hope is gone. It is long gone. The only hope left is the hope that everything doesn't go horribly wrong which is not the hope I want. It is not the hope that something wonderful might be found at the next corner.

Or maybe I am so trapped in heartbreak that I can't see the happiness. It has slipped so far from my grasp that I can't see a happy ending anymore.

Stopped to play Miss Spell's class again

OKAY! I am NO LONGER GOING TO TALK ABOUT THAT! MY GOD, how depressing I got. If you ever see me and it looks like I'm thinking, thats how I think. It all goes into this downward spiral until I have to switch and think about something else. Remember my first blog? It is that weird thought process I have that makes me crazy. Maybe my 11th goal for the summer should be to stop thinking like that before I go wacko...

Instead, I will share what I learnted from the book. I do not take morals or such from books. Pahh! Not me. Nope. I take character traits and file them into my MAY BE USEFUL FOR DEVELOPING IDEENTITY file-pile (imagine a ballroom filled to the ceiling with those neon colored filing folders. I collet them from characters in movies and books) in my brain.
So, this is what I filed:

JULIA'S PRETEND FILE INSIDE HER MIND

Date: Thursday, May 28, 2009

From: The Sweet Far Thing by Libba Bray

Personality Thingermabob: BELIEVING IN DREAMS

Describe in 3-5 paragraphs:

In Libba Bray's The Sweet Far Thing the main character Kartik believed a lot in dreams. It was, like, a main plot point. He believed in dreams. He had the dream and believed it to be true.

I shall claim this trait for my own. Kind of. [<-- I am counting this as a sentence File Inspector inside my mind] I have had a few dreams that haunt my thoughts. Things will happen in them and they affect my desires/fears so much, I cannot simply wave them off as a dream. Agh! Now I'm getting all sentimental about a dream that I had a year ago, that I love so much... I had it the night before my birthday. I spent my whole birthday thinking about what somebody said in the dream and had a dopey smile on my face all day because of it. Anyways.

I'm not going to be all like 'OH MY GOD! I'M GOING TO RUN OFF TO A CORN MAZE IN MEXICO AND ON MY MAGIC-CARPET RIDE BACK I WILL ALMOST FALL OFF AND I WILL CALL OUT FOR [NAME CENSORED] AND [NAME CENSORED] WILL COME TO MY CARPET FROM THE GROUND MAGICALLY AND WE WILL HAVE THIS [CENSORED but not naught censored. Censored like, 'I don't feel like finding my diary where I wrote it down and telling it to you,' censored] CONVERSATION. But I will take to heart what happens in the dream. Duh! that's never going to happen but maybe I should consider what [still not telling you] said. Maybe [I am tiring of this but I will not forfeit the name to the internet] actually thinks like that. Maybe truth lies there.

Why:

Because sometimes you desperately need to believe in things that don't seem to be real

Wells... There is my file. This day is now over. It is 11:59. tata!

Lets talk Politics

OK, I'm not going to point any fingers, but there is a certain country being led by very short,grumpy men that is kinda yanking my chain right now.

I am short and grumpy!

Like I said though, I'm not pointing any fingers and I will not name names. Instead, I shall speak of them in terms I think their small brains are capable of understanding and I shall start by naming them the Booger-Eaters. You can find the Booger-Eaters at this location: 40 00 N, 127 00 E on the globe. The Booger-Eaters have been in the news a lot lately because like all children their height, they are being naught just for the sake of being naughty. If you have ever babysat, you know what I am talking about; a kid decides they need more attention so they get a red glint in their eye and start jumping on the couch. The Booger-Eaters are doing this now, they are jumping on the couch with scissors in their hand. The rest of the world, the tall, non-booger-eaters are trying to get them off of the couch and put the scissors down but the Booger-Eaters persist! They are saying if anybody comes near them on the couch, they will cut their hair off. The Booger-Eaters do enjoy being naughty.

What are the Tall People (who hit a growth spurt on October 24, 1945) to do about the Booger-Eaters? The Tall People cannot go near the Booger-Eaters or they will get all of their hair cut off and they cannot simply let the Booger-Eaters misbehave so, what if the Booger-Eaters get the Glue-Eaters, Fart-Sniffers, Hair-Pullers and Frog-Lickers to start a jumping-on-couch-with-scissors phase! It could end the world!!! They can't make a deal with the Booger-Eaters nor can they tackle them or call their parents. The Tall People are stuck in a horrid situation, only able to wag their fingers and hope the Booger-Eaters stop at the moment.

This situation is something everybody should be keeping track of with a weary eye. What the Booger-Eaters and Tall People do can effect everybody. This is not to say you should be scared; we do not know what the Booger-Eaters plan to do. Maybe they just feel like jumping on the couch for a moment and will soon jump down, maybe they plan to cut every body's hair off. The best thing to do right now is sit and wag our fingers. Wag your fingers, Citizens of the World, and hope that it ends well... or hope that the Booger-Eaters accidentally stab themselves before they cut any body's hair off. Either or. Either or.

Post-script: It was very hard not to curse in this blog. I wanted to like "Those&*#%^@$% I &*#%$# hate them! What the &%#@*&%$ [<- I don't know how I did that, but my curse-word is clickable] is wrong with them, but I hope you'll find my Booger-Eater approach much more entertaining and enjoyable to read. I also hope you know what I'm talking about (if you don't the links help)...

Boring boring boring day

Ohh! It is getting so hard to blog everyday! My life is dreadfully boring at the mo. Next week though... oh ho! Next week (hint: it involves the beach)
There are only 18 minutes left of the day so I will tell you two short, for lack of a better word, stories.

I baby-sat today which was pretty boring because my charges were well behaved. All except once when I had to get my 7 year old cousin Chad the Alltel (that isn't how you spell it is it?) guy to play the violin. Let us say that he didn't want to. Not to fear, I used my first-time violinist skills to play and sing Come on Eileen, U Can't Touch this, and Don't Stop Believin'. If you have ever experienced severe ear poppage after a plane flight... the extreme pressure-pain... that was what I created. I WAS ALLMIGHTY! I COULD DO ANYTHING AS LONG AS IT REQUIRED HORRIBLE VIOLIN SHRIEKS! Lets just say, after the first chorus of Don't Stop Believin'... he grabbed the bow and started playing himself. I must buy a violin and walk the streets with my great power! I loved it!

The second thing... I woke up at 6am this morning to go to work. I woke up at SEVEN during the school year. I was not in a fit state to open my eyes. Yet I did, I also put on shorts. They are PJ Boxer short type things, with fake buttons on the front. Let us just say that *we've been doing a lot of just saying havent we?* I discovered the buttons in the back while on a bookstore run... twelve hours later. I'd been walking around with my shorts backwards ALL DAY! Oh, stupid is me!

ps. I highly reccomend the Great and Terrible Beauty Series

now I must go with 8 minutes to spare in the day

tata

Thriller and Doppy

Sorry I didn't blog yesterday. My B, but I didn't have anything to say. Actually, I had ONE thing to say. I have a Muse. The muses are technically the nine goddesses of the arts. They inspire creation. They are also a band on the Twilight soundtrack. Nowadays, when an artist is inspired by somebody they will be all like "Oh, you are my Muse! i love you! You help me create my art! Blah blah!" Well, ha! I have mine! It is the cutest little garden ornament. It's a cement stone shaped like an elf's head. He is either Yawning or screaming with his mouth stretched open. He has big fat cheeks and pointy ears pulled back to his head. He had a thick, wide nose that sticks out because of his yawn/scream. His nose is fun to rub. He also has scraggly cement hair that almost covers his itty bitty eyes. He's been painted to look like a yellowing greening brown rock, like something you found in a mossy forest. It is so cool. I love it to death. It is now my Muse. I love him. I need to name him though... his name is... his name is... Doppy. Like Dopey and Dobby mixed together. Doppy. I love him. I love Doppy. I shall rub his nose forever for creative inspiration.



Well that's all about that, I can't talk about Doppy forever. Instead I will talk about THRILLER! I have successfully memorized U Can't Touch This and will post a video of it soon enough *within a month at least. My next two weeks are busy!* Now I am starting to learn thriller. I've gone through all the moves and I've done the Thrill the World dance a few times but I haven't memorized it or anything. I'm going to spend about two weeks memorizing it. Then, I will do the dance with a few friends I will gather... wait for it.. in a cemetery. I'm not sure it's legal but it'll be fun! There's a cemetery very close to my house so we will put on costumes and makeup and go do the Thrill the World choreography to Thriller! It will be SO cool and SO much fun and it will DEFINATELY be a story to tell when I go to school next year. I would love to go do it in this close up hospital near my house but then the zombies might actually eat me.

So I will end this blog post and be on my merry way and YOU SHOULD BE TO summer is here so go and enjoy it!

but first, watch this:

There’s good days and bad days

In the words of the all-wise Kaiser Chiefs "Sticks and stones and animal bones cant stop me from having a good day on a bad day; There’s good days and bad days." See slightly extremely creepy video below paragraph. This speaks of my day perfectly. You know how I was having bad premonitions about my summer? ps. Those are not the spelling errors you are looking for. <- My Jedi mind trick.


Well, I was having a very bad first day of summer. I was woken up at the un-Godly hour of ten a.m. I had my coffee and watched an episode of the Nanny (WHICH HASN'T BEEN ON TV FOR LIKE 8 MONTHS, LIFETIME CHANNEL FOR IDIOTS WHO DECIDED THE NANNY DIDN'T NEED TO BE ON TV ANYMORE!). I was then told I needed to clean my room. I was fine with that, but I needed my music in order to clean my room. My iPod has my old music on it and since I do not have my laptop and therefore cannot sync anything, I had to burn a CD. After an hour of being unsuccessfully able to burn a CD with the computers in the house I was fed up. I let out a large eergg! and said dumb computers because of the computers' incompetency and I was told I'd had too much caffeine by my mother. She said I was addicted and it was becoming very bad. I ignored this and went back to using my computer skills to get more and more frustrated. My cat, however, thought it would be better to play scratching post with my feet. She got her CLAW stuck in my toe, so I screamed. My mom was not pleased with this. She told caffeine was making me into a crazy person she no longer knew. "MOM! That freaking cat was clawing me and it hurt! So I screamed" I also yelled this because I was not in a good mood. I'd just had a cat claw ripped out of my toe, the computer wouldn't burn a CD and my mom was telling me I was crazy. "Hurt-uhh. Screamed-uh" my mom said making fun of how I spoke (she says shes trying to stop a bad habit. I could replace it with punching her. Try to freaking stop that habit <- ps. I wouldn't actually do this. I just really want to sometimes, like when she says I'm crazy and makes fun of me). I hid myself in my room and moped until three after this.
At three my parents went to a neighboorhood festival thingermagiger, so I had the house to myself. I tried burning a CD again but the computer wouldn't play half of the songs I had on a playlist (computer issues, I'd explain it but I am too lazy) so I had to re-download a few songs. One of these, was Good Days and Bad Days. Remembering the lyrics, I decided they were right. I needed to make my first day of summer into a good day! Even if it had been a HORRIBLE day! So I memorized U Can't Touch This. (or at least 90% of it), I burned my CD (or is it burnt...), I watched another episode of the Nanny, and I learned half of Thriller. Now if somebody asked if it was a good day or a bad day, I would say I had a good day on a bad day. Thank you wise Kaiser Chiefs, because I could NOT have had a completely rotten day today. Not the first day of summer.

It is Summer now

Summer is when I am at my prime. Looking back at my past few summers, I have to smile. They have been awesome. I've made friends, experienced new things and I have been totally and unexplicitly, even though i have no idea what that word means, me. I am nervous today; however, today does not feel like the beginning of another great summer. It feels like the beginning of staring at a TV and doing nothing for a few months. This summer has to be great though... doesn't it? doesn't it?

DOESN'T IT? I mean, I have my ten goals:

1. Learn all words in Our House by Madness, Can't Touch This by MC Hammer, and at least one Queen song besides Bohemian Rhapsody

It is important to know the words to these songs. When you know the words to classic songs that nobody else knows the words to you become cool. You become untouchable... because my my my my music hits me, so hard, makes me say OH MY LAWD! Thankyou for blessin me with a mind to rhyme and two hyped feet it feels good when you know youre down. a superdope homeboy from the Oaktown and I'm known, as such and this is a beat uh. you can't touch.

2. Watch 1 classic movie each week (excluding weeks when I am on vacation)

It is important to quote old movies:

Luke, you do not yet realize your importance. You have only begun to discover your power. Join me, and I will complete your training. With our combined strength, we can end this destructive conflict and bring order to the galaxy.
I'll never join you!
If you only knew the power of the Dark Side. Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father.

He told me enough! He told me you killed him!

No, I am your father

*Luke makes funny face*
No. No thats not true. Its impossible
Search your feelings, Luke, you know it to be true
NOOOOO!!!!!!

and thats not even the best part of that movie!!

I love you *says Leia as Han Solo is about to be killed [or so they thought]*
I know *is his reply*

3. Learn dance to Thriller

talk about bustin' a move!

4. Write at least 10,000 words a week for my book that i am writing which i will not tell you anything about at all

When you write a book, its important to actually write

5. Speak with an English accent for a day

There is no reason for this. I just really want to do it.

6. memorize first page in harry potter

Because I need to secure my status as an ultimate Harry Potter fan

7. find an excuse to burst into song* preferably an 80s song (preferably ABBA or Queen even though they arent too 80s) during a converstion

There isn't a reason for this either. I just think it would make me interesting

8. Learn two Shakespear sonnets.

It is a summer of memorization

9. Be spontaneous on June 5th at 1:43 pm, and again on July 11rd at 6:24pm. (Oh nO! I'm already planning my spontaneity! stop it Julia!)

Because I'm just a spontaneus person.

10. Return to school with stories. Good storied about that wacky thing I did June 5th and about how I rapped You Can't Touch This in the middle of the French Quarter

This basically means that I have to use my new super powers to entertain people.

These should make for an interesting summer... I hope. What if it doesn't?!?! What if my summer is completely horrible. I must breathe deeply. I will have fun. I will have fun. I will have fun. I will have fun. I will have fun. I will have fun. I will have fun. I will have fun. WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE I WON'T HAVE FUN THIS SUMMER??