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Never Ever Attempt to Write a Novel

I do not like to write - I like to have written. ~Gloria Steinem
Ah! Oh, internet people, my head is bursting with plots and scenes and characters and ideas! I have the perfect novel jumping about in my brain. There are only a few problems.

Itty-bitty problems.

1) The scenes, characters, and ideas do not always match up. If I were to write down every single bit of novel inside my head onto paper, I would have about forty-nine distinct novels. Out of the many, I must choose a select few to make up my book. I am an indecisive person. Choosing what scene to put in a novel is like being at Baskin Robins. There are some familiar and comforting scenes such as chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. They will not make your novel great, but they are very enjoyable. There are the weird flavors such as bubblegum that will

never even be seen near the novel because they are absolutely disgusting. Then, there are the exotic flavors-- these are the flavors that are either absolutely heart stopping (metaphorically) or else absolutely heart stopping (literally). They are the risk flavors such as avocado and dandelion and can raise the novel, or raze the novel. When they are all in my head, I can never decide. I like vanilla-- it might need to be avocado-- Oh crap, they're all the same color today. I hope I don't accidentally pick bubblegum.

2) Sometimes I can see the scene perfectly in my head. I see all of the emotions and actions and dialog, I just can't choose the words to describe them. Words. I do not like words. Words themselves are fine, but combining them only causes problems. <- should a 'the' go in front of 'word?' Does this sound like I'm trying (and failing) to be funny? Perhaps I should make it funny. I should make it a joke. Uh, joke. joke. The words... no. I've got nothing. Maybe I should take a coffee break...

Now I must go, I've been procrastinating but it's time to actually write now. I will finish this blog tomorrow. Also, I am suuuppperrrr tired. I slept from 5:30-7:30 this morning. So.